Saturday, January 31, 2004

It has happened again, so many things to say, but to late to write about them on this blog. But I will write one of my dreams here. I normally don't do that, if you remember I pointed out once the reason. (I wonder how many will try to search for that argument... or who can recall it). The way I'll do this is by doing the dream twice. First how it was in italics, then I'll append comments on certain parts...

I'm going to get my visa-passport, the place is a great militar storage supply. The door detects any kind of metal, so every person who enters needs to strip himself of almost everything. So I walk until I found a table, to wait for my meeting. I'm in a rush. Around the table are the usual people with whom I normally eat, at the office. There's Hagen and Diana, for example. After I chit chat a while I had little discussion with Diana about a yellow substance she is ingesting. I stop talking 'cause now I know the reason behind my hurry. My daughter has a test to take. She is the oldest of three kids. And I see them. They are beautiful, full of life. I do love them. And that girl, I've seen her before, in my dreams. I take them to the store, which is inside that base. It's like a wall-mart, everything seems so blue. Then a small fight between my little childs, about something they want to buy. And then, I discover that my young little girl is not here! Desesperation. Where is she? I run through all the store, I enter the offices, nothing matters but finding her. I meet jaggy and ask for help, he starts also running. Then I encounter Hagen and Ilyann, by now they are married. I know Hagen would not help me so I plead Ilyann for help, she makes him start aiding me. I continue my quest. One thread of thought is, if anyone does anything to her (my child) I'll kill him with fire from my hand. The I see her, she went by herself to the exam. I'm so proud of her independence. I tell allan, to not worry more. This test is more like a school kind of thing, than an interview. She is asked for the name of presidents and thing like that. It appears to be for children only. It ends, and then a polecewoman enters. She will inspect them, so they will need to undress. The classroom is full of women, only my daughter is beneath the age when adolescence. They start to tak out the shirts, and then she figures she has no breasts. I feel her shame. I only want to explain her, later, that it is normal. So I start working to protect her. I find that the room has the door and the windows open. Outside the thing looks more like a vacation club. There are all the boys from the school, watching the prey. So I block the door and shout "Close your eyes, everybody. I'm serious." They of course aren't looking for my baby, but it will affect her anyway. But here and there someone open his eyes, so it's kind of hard. I had this strong urge to make a distraction. The Dennis Rodman comes and passes. Everyone is amazed and try to salute him. Then he grabs a bitch from the entrance (we are in the embassy). He returns to his room, never appearing again. By now the oscultation has ended. So I take my childs to home. Maybe in a green car/trunk. The house is the same where I grew up, my room is their now. Three small beds, with blue blankets. On the wall is a black tuxedo. Nailed. It is from my recent defunct pal padilla. Then Tamariz enters the room, trying to pray to padilla. It seems that padilla made a religion, and Tamariz is his highest priest. I want him out of my house, not only to leave padilla, but because my children has to sleep. I grab him out of that room. And then I yell him. "Stop adoring him. Yes, he was a great guy. He made awesome things. But he is human, just like you. If you stop doing prays and start making things you will do marvelous things also!" I don't think I convinced him, but he leaves. Just in time to say "Goodnight my loves".

Now that I have wrote it, I find it will not be just to detail with psicoanalisis what it meant to me. For I found beautiful that dream, even with all the weirdness.

On the next entry, maybe I'll talk about Tarot...


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