I intend to make a habit. A numerical trivia. I talked with adan about the monkeysphere. That made me realize, Can I name 150 persons who I care about? No I can't. I got 19. Reader, if I may say, try it at home. How did I defined "person I care about"? Someone who I would love to talk with in 10 years if by some reason I had a comma. I listed them in alphabetical order but it was a real experience to name them. To be honest, I got 5 with no effort, next 10 I had some difficulty and last 3 I almost missed them. I would have regretted if I had not included them. 42.1% are women. If my A/B testing is right... that's conclusive evidence that I have stronger relationships with men. Maybe not surprising to you, but I wasn't so sure. Years ago, I would have selected more women.

Anyway I will do this every year, to track how this works with me. (If I had had 3 male friends less statistically speaking my data would be useless in the gender enigma.)

On another topic, I was talking with daniel about important people when the question was raised... How many men have you met that have deeply provoked a breakthrough in your development? 2. And women? Again, 2.

Should I get a more active role in looking for people like these 4 friends? Or am I set to be Memo so that phase is over? Dunno. I know that my 19-names list just includes one of them. And she's fading out. (And pollo is dead.)

Why do I care about these numbers? To keep me true. I love my work, but I have from time to time remember that people matter and that I should spend more meaningful time with them. Life is good, as it happens, I got 2 weeks off to do just that :D

1. adan
2. ale
3. ana
4. bety
5. ceci
6. daniel
7. daniel r.
8. david
9. hagen
10. ivonne
11. jaime
12. jorge h.
13. julio
14. karina
15. madre
16. mauricio
17. monge
18. padilla
19. yéssica

If you don't see yourself there, there's a chance I'm forgetting you, sorry if that's the case. On the other hand, maybe you aren't that active in my life anymore. I had other names, other years. If it really bothers you, let's talk, this post is about doing that after all! Have meaningful interactions.

Hi guys, here's a list I did with Victor about how weird Jaime is. The story was this. I told him he is so strange that there's a very long list of weird things about him. "For example?" "Jaime, there are so many that you should ask if you want your answer by category, initial letter, or with a specific filter." He chose by alphabet... I could explain myself a bit better, but nah.

aseo (That means he has weird things for keeping his house clean)
balanceo (When nervous he kinda dance like a metronome)
caballero (He is always gentle, no matter the kind of girl he is around with)
domestico (He never wants to leave his house)
excentrico (blah blah)
fastidioso
goloso
honesto*
inconsistente*
jovato
kafkiano
lento
maquiavelico
nostalgico
orgulloso
pesimista
quixotico
repetitivo
sospechoso
taciturno
uraño
volatil
whimpsy
xenofilo
yavhético
zafio

Six days before my birthday and I come here to update my last will. Sure I do have one thing much more interesting to say, but I won't. Not yet, and not in english. So obviously I won't leave Pollo my sandman, and Allan is probably out of the game also (for better reasons).

David: pois, guitar, rubik, papercraft.
Julio: computer-related books, heroscape.
Yorch: scifi books
Julian: language-related books
Jaime: rpg books, munchkin
Padilla: graphic novels (excluding Sandman)
Allan: philosophy books, go books...

Damn, almost all my gifts are books, that tell us something. I wish I had something for ale, monge, diana and so on. I know my friendship with them is much more than mere objects. On the other hand, I hardly ever see yorch, but he is the person who should have my scifi. I guess I could give monge my "Dangerous Ideas", but it feels like cheating. Yes, Karina would receive almost everything else, at this point. (Please don't kill me!) However I don't think my Jared Diamond or Piaget books would be rightly served if Karina has them. Who would play my Fluxx? Well, some other day I will figure this out, for now, it is enough. Life's good.

I should contrast NJ/NY with Toronto, but am I not Memo?? Yes, I am. Therefore, I will talk about Sandman. About Absolute Sandman. Recently Matt, the RG client, gave it to me as a gift. I think I will start a new tradition here. You may not know it, but I love Sandman dearly. Who am I kidding? Anyone who actually knows me, knows that. It is my favorite book. Both because of its content, and because of the story behind me getting it.
I'm almost sure I most have told this story before, but don't stop me. As time goes a person changes so this might not be the same version. This is the story I told myself nowadays. ...Once upon a time, there was this boy studying his career. He loved math, philosophy and computers. Even though he was smart as no one, at least that's how he felt, he wasn't thinking anything exciting. What a waste of dreams and intelligence. He cared to be better in each conceivable way, but he thought that math was the ultimate way to sharp his mind. The truth is he felt lonely in that pseudo-intelligent sphere.
One afternoon while browsing the almost new world wide web, he read a story. A sand tale. It was beautiful. It felt good. It felt old, and tribal. All the right things were there. That was my first reaction. The second was kind of personal. Years ago I wrote a little story poem and it was very similar. Though mine wasn't as good, it was more sad. That's when I investigated all about Sandman. I could have easily download one or two pages. But no, something inside me dissuaded me. I had only read a transcript, so I hadn't actually met the book.
At the time I wasn't economically solvent so I had to save my pennies. I made myself a quest, to buy the first issue and see what it was. My life slowly changed. I was becoming less math oriented, more story oriented. You could say that's when I started dreaming about having a good story to tell to my grandsons. The first issue was good, but not life shacking. It didn't include this tale I found, so I continued. Slowly at first, but eventually it grew to be a rich philosophical garden. What are the endless? Why is Delight gone? Are really Despair and Desire irrevocably twins? I wasn't new to philosophy but Sandman provided me a common language to dream and talk with friends. In time this friends would become my dearest friends. And I personally believe without Sandman they wouldn't be so near, so dear. Sandman became our High Language, especially with pollo.
Trade Ppaper Book after TPB, I bought them all. It took me all my college years to have enough money to buy them all. Now this sounds laughable, but every one of these issues cost me, and I was happy for the bargain. I bought the tenth issue with the money I got from my official first paycheck. And a circle was closed.
Back to present times. Now RG is the place where I am going and I am. So... what if I go for a new quest, acquiring these absolute volumes from RG's success? Life is a funny little story, isn't?

Four things to do when you don't have an internet connection:
-Keep up with your novella!
-Learn your Teach12 courses
-Grow your German via Rosetta
-Write one more page for Inane

Four things you should do:
-Your portfolio (eipipuz.com)
-kaRma
-Arming
-MonkeyJump

Four things you actually do when it happens:
-Listen to Teach12 courses
-Blog entries

These are notes to myself. I remember when there was no internet. Before Reddit, Gmail, MSN, Blogs, Webcomics... It is a rainy day all over again.

---

Eight random thoughts that I may have written elsewhere.

1. People say 21 is when males' sexual desires are at their maximum; They are wrong.
2. People say I'm arrogant. I am, and it is a strength.
3. There are four kinds of multiverses and it is math all the way down. That's what I have come to believe.
4. There's a moment in everybody's adult life, the bacon point. It is when you realize you can eat all the bacon you want, when you want. I think most of my friends haven't fully grasped this, which is a shame.
5. Now it is official, most women of my age would classify as MILFs. That makes me more pervert or less?
6. I'm working with right-wing organizations. Helping them. I wonder, am I making the world any favor?
7. Allan thinks a person shouldn't be insulted by things that only insult a few. That's like arguing jokes are bad if only a few get them. And bad jokes are the only worthy jokes.
8. Truthfully I'm a little worried about Allan. He seems dim. Less an Allan, more a gray. His quest for pragmatism is turning him into a boring guy. Or more specifically, a risk adverse guy. If he thinks he isn't strong enough in X area, he will avoid it. Unfortunately he has good enough sense to know he isn't particularly strong in any area. Just like you, or almost any human being! He would claim X isn't his style... He's scare of his 30s. I'm not yoda this point, though.
9. Kamilo is pinoccio! Damn it, I should have seen this comming from afar.
10. I am no longer worried about Jaime. Thanks to Polo Polo.
11. I am doing something right, I keep finding I have great friends.

I rejected a very kind invitation from james. He told me if I wanted to rpg on Saturdays. I guess, I never expected to say "No" to that kind of invitation. The reason is simple. By what james has told me, they seem Munchkin. No thanks, I still dream of playing Wraith: The Oblivion one day...

---

On a side note, today I received the notification. Now I know how much my new salary will be. Good news, I won't work much longer here. I know, it sounds strange to receive the "you won't get as much as you expected". That means to me, "Let's face it. You won't be receiving what you think is fair. Therefore, there's no need to stay there." It's sad to say it this way, but I have lost any faith on my bosses down here. So there's only one place I can go, UP!

Farewell James. Life has a way of speaking. It teaches that once a friend goes to live to another city: A) you don't see him ever again and B) The world is flat. That in any other realm would be a paradox. Then again, a man never bathes twice on the same river. I wish him a great life if life goes A. Though if I have to be one hundred percent honest, I wish him an interesting life. One where he goes out of his caul. I respect his choice and all, but I'm his friend. That gives me the benefit of wishing him a better life, a better himself. He, probably, won't ever listen this unasked quote but "Life is too important to take it serious".

Anyway, this entry is for you pal. Not a critic but a "hey, my life will change with your departure". Don't want to sound like a mourn, it isn't. Have I need to talk about who is james, I've say:

He is strange. As all my good friends must be. He is shy and well grounded on his way of life. He is stubborn and has an inner paradox akin to julio and myself. Has a great urge to be kind. His my friend for many things. Among the multiples reasons, he is the guy to whom I can freely roam about rpg, sci-fi and alternative paradigms. He is the guy with whom I have fiercely compete of wod books :D He is the guy go sent me to HUE... wait that's not positive... Anyway, he is one of these fellows I would trust to live with if we were to create a tribe :P

Farewell

Today I found an old journal. I'm nervous. A long time ago I read ceci's diary. Back when she was a little little girl. I knew she was nervous of me reading it. Only had the chance to read 2 pages. Too intimate, I suspect. Now's time to pay back. Have I say I feel thrilled? The pages are very sad indeed. Back when I wasn't ready to accept my Brightness. There you won't see a stable memo. Those were dark moments... And the scary thing is that I've forgot almost all. Don't even remember when I wrote it. As I opened the pages, it flows, emotions, tons of them. Many condensed. I remember.

I'm so happy of reading it! How life has gone from that low... I wish I could say to that sad memo, don't worry you'll turn alright. The seeds of your Bright future are there. I see I continue to struggle with many weaknesses. That's fine. I'm hopeful now! :D Or was it ever?

Just a detail, I want to thank some guys. I didn't remember it that way. Yet I wrote, "Julio, javier[jaggy], jorge[yorch] and james are a bliss. They show me the kind of friends I can have." Guys, maybe I don't say it much, but all of you gave me hope for different reasons. Gracias.

It's always good to see yourself through the glass of time. =) Life's good.